9/3/1986
Once long ago there lived
a hobbit but not an ordinary hobbit,
mind you, but a very adventurous
one, there is a journal of his adventures.
One bright and sunny morning,
Sam was walking down the road,
cape as in his tweeds, a large white wolf
jumped out at him, so he drew his
dagger, and stabbed the wolf as it
lunged at him, so he went and rang
the wolf alarm and then raced swiftly
to his hole. Suddenly his hole started
cave-in and ran OUT as fast
as he could, BUT as he ran out,
a fire-breathing dragon cornered
and roasted him.
Once long ago there was a
clarinet player named Brian. The
clarinet player was the best clarinet player
in the land.
One day, he decided to take
a walk in the woods.
my theory of man:
evolution of man, is
that man is just
learning to use his
mental powers, just
as early man, just
began to use his physical
power.
One evening three wargamers
were enjoying themselves at a good
game of (T) Traveller. “I’ll look
soon, they started to wonder
“what happened to gamemaster?”
they were play a Traveller board
game because it doesn’t need a
gamemaster. Suddenly he walked
through the door, Mr. Slorance
was the gamemaster. He was
also the school historian. He
was a tall, thin and gray
man (w-) at the age of 60.
He sat down a newly made
module and said, “Sorry
I’m late, but I have a new
scenario, let me begin.” “I suppose
you have all of your old
characters because I will
take experienced characters
to play this module. Let “you
are (on) shipwrecked on a
strange planet,” “It seems to
be uninhabited.” “Before you were
shipwrecked your cruiser was
attacked by cosmic pirates.” Suddenly
the gamemaster broke into laughter
and the room was filled with smoke
(A) Suddenly the young gamers found
that they were in the far future,
and they weren’t gaming anymore.
Each of them, (A) (must) (be) David,
Wendell
and Mark had a puzzled look on
their face. They didn’t know what to think.
This is the story of a group of
freedom fighters in the far fu-
ture. Now the Earth is a barren
wasteland, the only forests
are succulents. (dom) The Earth
was taken over by the
Succulents. The succulents are
an alien race, they can be
described as human-shaped
and sized succulent.
Their goal, is to take
all the moisture from
from our planet and
return to their home
planet. Our story begins
with a group of freedom
fighters who have
stowed away on an
alien ship. Once they
ship touched ground the
freedom fighters
There was once a fat gnome
named Matt who got his
jollies from a baseball bat
he rubbed and he rubbed
till his dick was but
a stub and he exclaimed
“I regret that!”
I had a dream that
I was camping in
the Australian Outback
with my scout troop
and a girl scout troop,
all the girl scouts
were real good
looking, I had a
friend who was
an aborigine
who was lost
from his tribe
so that night
I tried to
help him,
until I was
caught
by the
scouts who
thought
I wanted to go and
make-out with one
of the girl scouts.
The next night
the girl scouts and
boy scouts were all
making-out in
a big shack. A
beautiful blonde picked
me up and said, “come
on, lets go make-out
with the rest.” But
we were too late
and the girl scout
leader said that all
of this would go
on to ~~not~~ fucking go
she made us stop, my
we got home on a Monday.
All of this took place
in an Australian jungle.
The Pigeon Man – One day
after our class
oceanography trip
out to the forest,
we encountered
a strange old
man who
was calling
the pigeons
“Little
Bums”,
he kept
disappearing
and then showing up
again – like he did when
we had to leave, but
then he popped up in
the bathroom standing
next to us using the
urinal next to
us. One time he
had disappeared and
then reappeared, telling
us all about the
different languages
he knew. He would
dig in trashcans
for food for the
pigeons. David
Pimley’s mom
said that he was
overfriendly because
he was lonely – so that
was why
he was talking to the pigeons. I think he popped-up so much because I was friendly to him and he wanted to be friends with me. I would have become friends with him, but I had to leave.
I think that all the nations of Earth should write, and rename Earth using its Latin name, Terra.
(Illustration page containing an inverted sketch of a man in a shirt and tie)
(Illustration page containing an inverted sketch of a man wearing a belt, pants, and shirt)
There was once an old man named Arthur on a bench. He wore a sweater.
Whether death is death or life is life doesn’t matter. What matters is the preservation of humanity and the common respect that comes out of Christianity.
“Where you are, so I have been, where I am, so you shall be.” A quote from a gravestone.
Tensions had been incredible between the two super-powers for decades. The year is 1999. Boom!!!
How I hate thee, let me list the ways. Your dirty body, Your scummy breath, Your pale face,
I am as I am, and so I will be, but how that I am none knoweth trulie.
If you love someone… set them free, but if they don’t come back, hunt them down and kill them
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